Monthly Archives: September 2015

How Can Dads Connect With Their Kids – LIVE Recording On Blab – Dudes To Dads Ep 30

This is a special episode as we recorded live on Blab.im.  It allows us to be seen on video while guests are able to interact live with us by chatting.  This episode is all about connecting.

Everyone, especially children, want to feel connected. When they don’t feel connected at home, school, or within the community, they will find connection through bad behavior including sex, drugs, gangs, etc. This is why kids engage in this kind of behavior is that they want to feel connected.  Jason mentions having dinner together and how doing that 3 times a week or more can reduce alcohol and drug use by half. It’s not just about the meal but it provides a time to talk and find out about their day or what they are doing.

One of the most important things to learn is empathy.  Having empathy for your children allows them to feel understood and therefore connected.  We cover more on empathy in Episode 18.

We then discuss a Huffington Post Article written by Author/Speaker which offers 5 ways to connect:

1) Ask them questions about their life – most parents have no clue what is going on – If they don’t want to talk, it may mean they feel disconnected

2) Hug, touch, or sit near them – We all need touch and kids really like it

3) Figure out what they like and learn about it – Showing an interest in what they do or like makes them feel connected

4) Have technology-free times and places – If you are on the phone or computer you may as well not even be there

5) Play and do activities with them – not everyone likes to talk. Whether its a game, sport, and craft, kids all have something they like.…

Is It OK To Parent Someone Else’s Kid? Get Kids To School On Time, 100 Ways To Show We Care – Dudes To Dads Ep 29

Episode 29 starts with the update from Jason and Alan that the website now has an email signup.  Listeners can keep up to date on news, episode releases, and more.  Our first segment is a Dad’s Debate on whether it is ok to “parent” other kids when you are somewhere.  Of course every situation is different but the guys provide their views on how situations should be handled.  We then move into the Battlefield where we review getting the kids out the door for school and provide a few tips to make that easier:

  1. Get the kids to bed on time
  2. Get kids an alarm clock.  Wake them softly.
  3. Have kids layout clothes the night before (don’t forget shoes)
  4. Prepare lunches the night before
  5. Setup a schedule with specific times and activities
  6. Make sure routine items are in the same place (toothbrush, hairbrush sunblock)
  7. Same goes for food.  Allow them to get their own food for breakfast.  They are totally capable
  8. Be on time yourself

Jason then shares a story in which a friend of his told the child that the car was leaving at a specific time and because the child was not ready, she missed her ride.  The child was never late again.  In Stuff To Do Jason discusses creating a scavenger hunt.  Here are some instructions:

  1. Decide where you want to do it (in the house, outside, at a park)
  2. Gather some items that will need to be found.  Can even be household items
  3. This can work with only 1 child but more kids would probably more fun.  You could even invite the neighborhood kids and separate them into teams so they have to work together.
  4. Create a prize at the end
  5. You can do it for time and see which team has the most items, or

Why Should I Care? How Caring Is Essential In Parenting Success – Dudes To Dads Ep 28

Jason begin the episode talking about his camping weekend with his daughter.  They are part of the local YMCA Adventure Princesses which offers dads and daughters the ability to go camping together.  They teach the 6 aims:

  1. To be clean in body and pure in heart
  2. To be pals forever with my dad.
  3. To love the sacred circle of my family.
  4. To listen while others speak.
  5. To love my neighbor as myself.
  6. To seek and preserve the beauty of the Great Spirit’s work in forest, field and stream.

Topic for this podcast is Caring. The guys share that there is now an email signup form on the site which will send out updates and alerts when new things happen.   Jason offers the definition of Caring which is  1) Displaying kindness and concern for your child,  2) The work or practice of looking after those unable to care for themselves and finally 3) offering love and affection.  Caring is all about the heart and Jason indicated that the #1 thing he learned from parenting classes and reading about parenting is to parent from the heart instead of the head.  When parenting from the heart, it is easier on yuorself and the child. We are more calm, more present, and overall more effective in whatever we are trying to do.

Caring is also unconditional. We are not expecting anything back in return.  So how can we show our kids that we care? There are tons of ideas but Jason offers his 3 favorites:

  1. Ask them questions, show interest in what they are doing
  2. Watch over them and protect them – holding their hand, being present, teaching them right and wrong
  3. Provide a lot of affection – hugging, kissing, general touch.

The guys then close the show with a quote from Mac …

Do Men Parent Differently Than Women? – Interview With Parenting Expert Susie Walton – Dudes To Dads Ep 27

In this episode 27, Jason and Alan have the opportunity to sit down with Susie Walton, author of “Key to Personal Freedom – How Myths Affect Our Family Lives” and creator of the Joy of Parenting courses. Susie’s courses are what got Jason started on his journey to active and effective parenting. Susie has been teaching, speaking, and coaching on parenting for nearly 25 years. Jason calls her”The Fairy Godmother of Parenting” as she is a driving force in helping thousands of people create peace in their homes. He often thinks “What would Susie do in this situation” which helps him solve the problem.

Susie shares how and why she got started in teaching parenting classes. She also helps us understand some very important parenting concepts, as Jason shares his favorite concepts from her teachings. She sheds some light on whether men and women parent differently.

If you want some excellent tips on how to parent from the heart and raise capable children, listen to this episode.…

Effective Parenting Requires Commitment, Why Do Parents Not Commit? – Dudes To Dads Ep 26

In this episode 26 we cover the concept of commitment. While most people attribute commitment to a romantic relationship or marriage, we are discussing the commitment to effective and mindful parenting. It’s about committing to doing what it takes to have a good relationship with your children, commit to learn new concepts and be open.

Unless you are being forced to listen to this podcast, you are already making some commitment that the topic of effective parenting and creating a wonderful relationship with your children is important. But why doesn’t everyone commit to that? Why are some going through the motions and okay with not making any substantial effort in this area. Here are a few reasons it seems people don’t commit:

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of being rejected
  • Fear of making the wrong decision
  • Trust issues
  • Not enough time?
  • Not knowing what to do

What keeps people from committing to wanting a better relationship with their children? Why do people not seek out better ways to handle situations? How to connect better with their children? Alan and Jason discuss the topic of commitment and answer some of these questions.

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