Monthly Archives: June 2017

Helping Your Child Deal With Losing – Dudes to Dads Ep 121

Whether your kids are playing sports or playing a board game, losing is a part of life. Maybe they slam their game pieces on the board or throw their glove into the dirt? Losing is a reality. How can we have our kids enjoy competition yet understand how to cope with losing properly?  Is there such thing as losing properly?

I played sports growing up and I recall losing was pretty devastating to me. I was a very competitive child. However I can’t recall any competitive losses that have stuck with into adulthood. They are really no big deal. At the time they may have been, but now they are not.  I personally think being competitive is a good thing. I do however think it’s important to understand how you act and deal with others when you win or lose is important.

So how do we help our kids deal with losing? Here are a 8 tips:

1. Re-define Winning – We had expert coach Terry Liskevych who put things in perspective. The most important thing when kids are young is that they have fun. Discuss what sportsmanship is as well as possibly talking to them beforehand about the upcoming competition.

2. Set a good example – monkey see, monkey do. If you have a weekend basketball league and your kids see you throwing the ball against the wall in anger, you might want to re-evaluate that.

3. Give them positive attention – When they do something positive, make sure that is re-inforced. “I saw you help the other team member get up from the floor. That was really good sportsmanship”. or “You should be really proud of yourself for diving for the ball and going after it.  See our episode 109 for more on this.

4. Empathy – …

Teaching By Example – 8 Things Dads Can Do To Positively Influence Their Child – Dudes To Dads Ep 120

Monkey See, Monkey do.  In episode 120 our friend Alan joing Jason & Alan for another episode.  With many of the things we talk about here, we start with us leading by example. I thought we would bring a list together of 7 things we can do to positively influence our child.

1. Be Polite – They hear you saying please and thank you. They also hear how you talk to them. How you treat wait staff, employees, etc.

2. Help Others – Let them see you helping other family members, friends, and the community. Involve your kids in the process if you can.

3. Celebrate diversity – People are all different and that is a wonderful thing. Allow them to appreciate that everyone is different and that is what makes the world great. Take interest in other cultures. Have friends from different backgrounds.

4. Be responsible with money – they see how we spend and our attitudes about money

5. Express Emotion – Emotions are not good or bad, they just are. It’s ok for your kids to see

6. Work Hard – If you want something, you need to work for it. Hard work pays off

7. Enjoy life – It doesn’t matter what your passion is or what you enjoy, give yourself time to do it. It needs to balance with your desire. This can mean go on vacations, do things that bring joy into your life.

8. Take Care of Yourself – This means mind, body, and spirit. Practicing mindfullness like meditation and/or yoga as well as creating healthy eating habits.

Some of these may seem obvious, but sometimes the obvious things are the things we miss because we take them for granted.…

Restarting Your Relationship With Your Child After Divorce – Dudes To Dads Ep 119

For Episode 119, Alan and Jason are joined by Jason’s friend Alan who’s story helps articulate some of the difficulties dads go through with their kids during a divorce.  Sometimes the relationship can feel like you are starting over.  For the kids, they may be in an unfamiliar environment which can add additional stress to them.  The discussion some understanding of what both dads and their kids may go through during the divorce as well as offering these tips to maintain the connection with your child during these difficult times:

1. Make sure the time you do spend with them is quality, focused attention

2. Don’t force it – be flexible

3. Be involved in their activities

4. Communicate often – text, phone, skype, email.  Schedule if possible

5. Be consistent  – do what you say you are going to do – times, schedules, etc.

6. Have to cooperate with ex whether you want to or not – sometimes that cooperation needs to be forced.

7.  Showing them love – more important than telling.  Show interest in what they are doing.  Discover things you can share.…

How Dads Can Bond With Their Baby – Ep 118

This episode is for the new dads.  Oh, it’s exciting.  You get to hold your baby for the first time.  There is nothing like holding your newborn baby and feeling like you can’t believe that you can love something so much.  Then a few days go by.  And then a few weeks. Unless you are spending a lot of time with the baby, it can be difficult for you as the dad to feel an immediate close bond with the baby.  I’m sure some guys do, but many do not.

I know with my kids, the first few months there was much more time spent with my wife than me.  Whether that was my doing or not, I worked and she was the one who was breastfeeding, fell asleep with them on occasion, or just simply took them wherever she went.

Men can often have a more difficult time feeling the immediate bond with the child.  Mom had a 9-month head start.  As such, here are a few tips to bond with your baby:

1) Talk to your baby – My wife would talk to our kids before they were born.  I found it a little difficult but would occasionally give a high five or say hello.  It just takes practice to become comfortable with it.

2) Carry your baby – Whether this is in your arms or in a sling, carrying the baby allows both you and it, to feel close.

3) Skin To Skin Contact – There is something about a baby’s skin that is just amazing.  It’s soft and feels nice.  The touch is also good for the baby.  You could either place the baby simply on your chest while reclining or laying down or even give the baby a massage.

4) Give the baby a bath

Let's get social on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn!